I have always had a heart for children. It’s the way God made me. I never expected having my own children would be difficult. When my husband and I were “ready”, we didn’t expect to get pregnant right away; but we certainly didn’t expect to wait two years! It was a hard two years. Luckily, I was surrounded by the right people to lift me up when I was feeling down. Every month was disappointing, but each month also brought hope for another chance.
I never really had the desire to be a career woman. I went to school to be an art teacher because it combined two things I loved :art and kids. I didn’t meet Dustin till after college, so I didn’t know I’d have the possibility of having children. When I met Dustin, I fell in love with him immediately because I just knew he’d be a fun, loving, and sweet daddy. I felt like I was failing him for not being able to bear children.
You might be thinking “how’d you know the problem lied with you and not Dustin?” Well, while we were living in State College, we participated in a fertility study and they gave us some results regarding Dustin that were positively glowing. He clearly was not the problem, so I was. Devastating. I take things personally.
However, because I was identified as the issue, I was driven to research and do everything I could to increase our chances and rebuild my fertility naturally.
I, personally, was not willing to subject my body to a bunch of artificial hormones, or try IVF. I am of the belief that if your body is protecting you from having a baby for some reason, you shouldn’t play God to instill a baby into a body that isn’t healthy enough to conceive. That’s why so many IVFs and IUIs don’t take…and then you pay thousands of dollars just for a small chance it will take! I would rather pay money to adopt.
I was willing to try anything naturally. I read everything I could get my hands on regarding fertility.
One of the first books I read that every woman should have on her bookshelf is Taking charge of your Fertility.
There is a website (http://www.TCOYF.com) related to the book that I found to be extremely helpful. It’s a community of other women all trying to get pregnant. I found it to be therapeutic, sharing this journey amongst other women.
If you are reading this and battling infertility, feel free to contact me personally for support. I’ve been in your shoes, and it’s so nice to have someone that you can confide in who’s gone through it or going through it.
In my next post I will share the specifics of what changes I made and what things I tried in my quest for fertility.
(To Be Continued)